


Just How You Are With Love

by Hitsugi_Zirkus



Category: DRAMAtical Murder
Genre: Angst, Birthday, Flowers, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-08-20
Updated: 2014-08-20
Packaged: 2018-02-13 22:53:46
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,963
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2168280
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hitsugi_Zirkus/pseuds/Hitsugi_Zirkus
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Noiz was terrible with birthday presents. That much was evident when Koujaku tells him he hates flowers. </p><p>Well happy fucking birthday.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Just How You Are With Love

**Author's Note:**

> SO I HAD PLANS TO WRITE FOR THE DUMB HIPPO'S BIRTHDAY.... But then I got caught up in my OUAT marathon and next thing I know it's dark outside, haha. So here I am, an hour left of Koujack's birthday, and I'm sliding in some last-minute Kounoi, ye. Took like and hour and a half to type, but I'm pretty satisfied with it. 
> 
> Expect feels of some sort because Noiz having awkward dokis is what I live for.

Noiz couldn't help but have that deep pit of failure sink in his stomach at the sight of Koujaku's face. It reminded him of the days he had tried, _really_ tried to be normal. Yet all his parents did was peer their noses down at him as if he were an unsightly obligation to deal with.

Koujaku's lips were pressed thinly together, his countenance a carefully composed mask that it couldn't be read as him being angry or disgusted. So standing at his door, bouquet of flowers in his hand, Noiz felt very stupid very quickly. It made him want to close the door and go home to the darkness of his room all over again, away from that expression that so loudly said he'd messed up.

It had been three months. Three months of officially graduating from the hatefucks and coming into a relationship. An actual relationship and Noiz was doing his best to maintain it despite having zero experience with dealing so intimately with another person. But considering it was the first birthday of Koujaku's he'd be spending with him, Noiz wanted to do something. Even if it was small.

So what the hell was that look?

"You allergic?" he asked, taking a stab at lightening the mood.

Koujaku's expression barely changed. With a glance down, he opened his door wider and stepped to the side without a word. Noiz slipped in the apartment, taking in the familiar scent of fresh cherries and incense. It was a spicy and sweet fragrance Noiz had gotten more and more accustomed to associating with the word home. Even the bouquet didn't overpower the aroma of Koujaku, and his home.

"Staying in on your own birthday, old man?" Noiz asked, glancing around to see the apartment strangely empty. He'd expected at least a member of Benishigure to be by. When Koujaku didn't answer him right away, he probed, "Well, I guess you're up in those years now that you can't stay out late, right?"

Koujaku moved into the kitchen, where he'd been apparently preparing a simple dinner. "Ah, Aoba came by earlier. So did Kou and some Benishigure."

"Well, I came by because Mizuki decided to elect the boyfriend to drag you on down to your party at Black Needle."

"Oh. Guess that explains why he said he was busy all day."

Unsatisfied at how Koujaku wouldn't even  _look_ at him, Noiz squinted his eyes. Again, he tried at some conversation. "Hey, aren't you gonna get a vase? Word on the street is, these things need water." He held the bouquet out.

Despite recalling the many times his mother would clutch a phone to her ear, requesting this or that specific kind of arrangement for some at-home business dinner, Noiz wasn't actually very knowledgeable about flowers. He could only name as many flowers as he had fingers on one hand. So once he had gotten to the actual shop, what had once been a simple few red roses had blossomed into a bouquet bursting of every crimson bloom he'd seen that seemed beautiful enough. Some of them probably didn't mix very well in the arrangement as a whole, and the overall presentation like some grade-school collage, but every time Noiz's eyes caught a new flower, he only thought, _His eyes. They match his eyes_.

Koujaku was narrowing them. "Is this a joke?"

The comment shouldn't have squeezed Noiz's heart like this, nor should it have especially mattered. They were just flowers. It _had_ mostly been a joke, a formality anyway because Noiz sucked at the whole birthday thing, sucked at the relationship thing, and definitely did not know how to _give_ to someone.

"Kind of," Noiz said slowly, lowering the bouquet. "I thought it was pretty standard."

A frown continued to crease Koujaku's brow, looking like he'd like nothing more than to toss the flowers away. But then he glanced up, at Noiz's face, and while Noiz had thought he'd kept himself pretty composed, it was obvious his expression revealed the inadequacy bubbling in his chest.

Koujaku's gaze softened. His mouth opened and closed, hands fiddling with the pans and chopped vegetables in front of him. "Sorry. Sorry, I didn't... I just... I'm bad with flowers. I don't _like_ flowers." His fidgeting increased as he spoke, fingers raking over his bangs, patting them over the half of his face that he always covered.

By now, Noiz recognized the movement for what it was, for hiding the tattoos on his face. Noiz looked from there, to the right side of his body, to the curve of his back as Koujaku turned, so clearly able to see the soft petals decorating it under the vibrant red cloth.

To be honest, there wasn't much that Noiz knew about Koujaku's past or whatever baggage he carried. It was a tightly shut room that Noiz didn't think either of them were ready to open quite yet, just like Noiz wasn't ready to wiggle out from his chains. He _did_ know that Koujaku covered his tattoos, and absolutely did his best to never let Noiz gaze at the ones on his back too often. Noiz had no idea why, and thought that the flowers blooming over his muscles were quite pretty. But he knew without Koujaku saying it that he utterly detested them. Why did he get him then? Who knew. But Koujaku kept them out of sight and likely wanted the same for the so-called present Noiz got him.

Well. Fuck. Of course Noiz was being an insensitive shit. Of _course_. Noiz lowered the bouquet to his side. "My bad. Here, lemme get these out of sight." He went over to the trashcan, thinking to tell Koujaku that he'd take a stab at making the rest of dinner to make it up to him. Considering he couldn't cook to save his life, it was probably just as well he'd fuck that up too. Happy fucking birthday, Koujaku.

"N...no, wait." Koujaku's voice was a hesitant stutter. He grabbed Noiz's wrist and yanked it back. "It's okay. You don't have to. Let me just look for a vase." He took the bouquet and started opening up cabinets.

Noiz frowned, following Koujaku's movements and clueless as to what the hell he was trying to pull. "Seriously, you can throw them out. It's not a big deal. It's your birthday, so go bananas." He didn't want Koujaku accepting them just because of whatever look he'd had on his face to make him falter. It just wasn't worth it.

But Koujaku was adamant now, talking back to Noiz again. "So let me do what I want and get a vase for these." He brought up one, made of clear, light-green glass. After filling it with water, he positioned it right on the bar, putting the assortment of red blooms inside it.

"Are you serious?" Noiz muttered.

"Yes," Koujaku snapped back, but he wasn't angry. "I've been meaning to liven the place up anyway. Looks better already." He placed his hands on his hips, nodding in approval.

Unless there was some career in interior decorating that Noiz didn't know Koujaku had, he had to be blind to the mess that was that bouquet. "I know you question my aesthetic choices every chance you get, so I'm gonna have to call bullshit here and say even I know those roses don't go with those daisy ones."

"You mean dahlias," Koujaku said with an amused smile.

"You're a goddamn florist too," Noiz snorted, tossing his hands up.

Koujaku shrugged. "My...mother dabbled in flower arranging. So I got an eye for it, I suppose." He smirked then, reaching out to lightly kick Noiz's leg. "It looks like some brat just put it together."

Now Noiz shrugged. "I should've figured you were a chocolate kind of guy." He leaned his elbows back on the bar, staring at the bouquet, then to Koujaku, searching for a trace of the discontent he had before. "You really don't gotta keep them. It was just a formality."

Koujaku joined Noiz, looking more relaxed as he played with the snake bites beneath his lips. "I was always a romantic guy, and well, they _are_ beautiful." The corner of his lips quirked in a small smile that he offered Noiz. "They're great. Thank you."

Floored by the response, Noiz opened his mouth and nipped at Koujaku's finger. Closing his lips around to the first knuckle, Noiz laved his tongue over it, tasting the pepper he'd been putting on the food. Koujaku played with Noiz's tongue, gaze falling over Noiz's face with that bordered sense of desire and affection Noiz had completely come to be enthralled by.

Would he have ever found a reason to be drawn to a stare like that if he hadn't found Koujaku? Koujaku, who had hacked away his walls with a sword and held him in place with a firm grip and strong arm. Koujaku, who held that fire that matched his in his eyes, even when one night his kisses hadn't been as hard, his voice just a little more desperate.

Noiz had been together with Koujaku long enough to know the look of someone who wanted to die with all his heart. He knew how to see that sheer acceptance of oblivion in someone's mind. Sometimes, Koujaku still had that look. He had it if Noiz kissed along his back and he told him to stop. Had it during that one isolated night when Koujaku had woken up shaking and sobbing for someone, someone who dabbled in flower arranging and loved Koujaku, someone Noiz never had.

Yeah, Koujaku still got that look. Like tonight, it was sometimes even Noiz's fault he got it. But Noiz always sat rooted firmly, and Noiz always held the shaking hand and animalistic gaze wordlessly because he didn't know how to comfort anyone in any way except physically.

Noiz wanted to feel pain, maybe even die from it. Koujaku knew that feeling, and they clashed together like perfectly fallen pieces. But they both went on. Noiz stayed. Koujaku scowled and _touched_ him and kicked him back to his feet and those all _mattered so much_.

How do you thank someone who thought about dying that they've lived another year? Koujaku, who probably wondered why he was still alive, lived another year. And Noiz was going to spit on his fucking grave if he ever thought of leaving before another birthday, before he could get it right and keep awkwardly celebrating with Koujaku until he _knew_ what Noiz felt.

But Noiz's tongue wouldn't get any of the words out. They were stolen away by each movement of Koujaku's finger, like he was beckoning those innermost thoughts right from him. That was what Noiz believed as he ran his thumb over Koujaku's beating wrist, keeping his stare locked onto the blood-crimson of Koujaku's eye.

"Happy birthday then." He pulled back, licking a stripe over Koujaku's finger once more.

Koujaku grinned. "Yeah. Thanks, brat. Come on, we're going to the convenience store."

"What for?"

"I'm taking you up on that chocolate offer from before. Black Needle is gonna be open for hours, so there's no rush yet."

Noiz feigned appall, raising his eyebrows. "What's this? You're gonna ruin that pretty figure of yours, old man."

"I think you reminded me since it's my birthday, I can do as I like." With a smug grin, he leaned in to peck Noiz on the lips and started heading for the door.

Noiz followed, trying not to scoff. "And here I thought age was supposed to cure that cockiness."

"What can I say? Having a brat hang around me is keeping me young."

Noiz practically kicked Koujaku out the door, smirking. "Yeah yeah, whatever helps you sleep at night."

 

**Author's Note:**

> They split the chocolate and the booze over at Black Needle and then proceed to have nice. rough, drunken sex back at Koujaku's place for hours. 
> 
> Happy birthday, Koujack. May you continue wooing women and fashion disasters alike for many years more.


End file.
